I am still here! But, I still have this awful De Quervain’s Tendinitis in both wrists. It’s a neat little injury that makes things like putting my hair in a pony tail or wiping my butt ungodly painful. I don’t know that I got it from typing, like I originally thought. I’ve read that sometimes pregnancy hormones just bring it on. But I do know that typing makes it hurt more and that rest and ice are all I can do to keep it from getting worse. I also know that new moms get this a lot from hoisting little babies, so if I can’t get the pain under control now I can imagine how bad it’s going to be when I’m lifting two kids for diaper changes umpteen times a day.
I’d say I’m keeping this post brief for that reason, but it’s not true. This is why I stay off the computer – if I start writing, I have a hard time stopping.
I’m fairly certain that this last stage of pregnancy has been specially designed to torture me in new and inventive ways since:
- I can’t leave my bed AND
- I can’t really be online very much AND
- I can’t really type, which means I can’t write much, which means I have no real outlet now to vent my frustration AND
- Watching movies all day makes me feel like I am INSANE and is beginning to give me bad headaches
So you know what? I am beginning to really look forward to giving birth.
Yeah, I know it will hurt LAMF. No matter what path the birth takes. But I am beyond that right now. Labor has to end at some point. C-Section recovery would suck, sure, but bazillions of women do it and survive. I can too.
Yes, I am aware that the arrival of my two boys will make my life an utter living chaotic sleepless hell and did I mention, I won’t get any sleep until they’re in college, and they’ll cry and poop and vomit on things and cost so much money and oh my god, how will I do it, how can I survive, HOW DO ANY PARENTS OF TWINS EVER MAKE IT OUT ALIVE?
I am a little burnt on the well meaning attempts to “prepare” us for how hard this is going to be. I have some feedback for you, well-intentioned advice givers who may already be parents:
Do you think I am an idiot? I am almost 40 years old, not 20. I KNOW IT’S GOING TO BE HARD.
I am prepared for the following:
- The realization that there’s no real preparation for this. We’re just going to have to jump in the deep end and swim LAMF.
- However hard I think it’s going to be, I have no idea how hard it really will be.
- Everything in my existence will be different (no shit, that’s the whole point, right? Otherwise why go through all that damned IVF?)
I’m sorry if that doesn’t satisfy you that I understand how god awful being a new parent is. In any case, please, please, please for the love of all that’s holy, just SHUT UP. Stop going on about how hard it is for a few, ok? I know a lot of you have probably jumped into parenting weepy eyed and misty and sentimental and really unaware of how radically life changing parenting would be. I AM NOT LIKE YOU. I am ultimately an over anxious pessimist, so I’m sure I’ve got the “holy shit, what have I done?” experience covered. And plus, I want my life changed radically, get it?
Still here? Thanks for your patience. I had to get that out of my system, and no, it’s not directed at anyone specific, and certainly not anyone I know. It’s directed at the well meaning strangers in doctor’s offices and parking lots who have to make comments, and just about everything I read these days that goes on and on about how awful labor and delivery will be, and how hard it is to be a new parent (especially of twins, OMFG!) but yet how, “oh, it’s all worth it.” It’s like they’re writing a column called “Basics of Life for Total Dumbasses.”
Can you tell I’m reaching the end here?
When my hands recover, whenever that is, I’ll come back and write about the last few weeks. They’ve been, well, they’ve been.
We are 33 weeks and two days today. If I get past 34 weeks and go into labor, they’ll let me deliver. I am hoping to get to 36, but am also in the “hey, whatever happens I’m just along for the ride” state of mind now.
Allow me to leave with a status pic:
If I can post again, I certainly will.
May all your pregnancies be sparkly and light and full of only the advice you seek.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
I am so glad you posted. I think about how you are doing a lot. Looking at your belly all I can think is “give the woman whatever she wants.” You are a hero!
Amazing belly! I would call it a “baby bump” but seriously, that’d be downplaying the load you’re carrying. Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment, and thank you even more for posting an update/rant … I am RIGHT THERE with you in the spirit of “holy fuck people, shut up, I don’t expect this to be easy but that doesn’t make me any less eager for it to start”.
I’ve been thinkin about you & Doot & Bing! So sorry to hear that the tendinitis is really fucking with you
I’m looking forward to your next update, no matter how fast or slow it happens.
Three things:
I love you and I love those two babies.
Okay, five:
I love your blog posts, and I’ve got your back.
Myg, Can I just say that although I can’t relate specifically to what you are going through, cuz I believe truly in the “if you haven’t walked it you don’t know it philosophy”, I can say that we are all pulling for you and the little dudes. Also, even in your pain you bring us joy, cuz this post has me LMFAO!!
I agree with you, the baby websites and pregnancy books are written for idiots. After a few weeks of pregnancy I couldn’t bear to read them anymore without feeling like I needed to scoop out half my brain.
Actually, my theory is that the end of pregnancy is painful to get you to actually wish for labor to come…who in their right mind would otherwise? Although, I think your pregnancy has definitely been harder than most.
Nothing that is worth doing in life is easy anyway…..
meh….it’s not that bad….the pregnancy was the worst bit. If I could buy a baby at the grocers I’d have a dozen.
Just wait until you hear the advice they shovel at you AFTER their born….
Hey Amy – This is Kim from eskimo kiss/we fest… i’ve been following your blog since we became fb friends
and wanted to with you the very best of luck, sounds like the big day is coming very very soon! I’m enjoying reading your blog as I’m 36 and not yet a mom, but hope to be “someday.” will be thinking of you and alex, good luck!